no, i haven’t written my story….u generalize ur assumptions and u think that i too would write my story, u know bits of my story and u think i would have written it but i havent, u write urs, i’m not you….and i dont know why i haven’t..i have written alot of absrct on my thoughts and feelings but never just what it is, links and chains…..it’s like if i write it all down, i will have to accept it to be true, validate my life, the good and tha bad…..when its written and said out loud, it’s the no turning back point, no ‘maybe i got it wrong’…it’s done…….its real…..and i would be part of the reality which i suppressed.
attachment, i walk away from, u’d be suprised, i really do walk away….i have made awesome friends, bt i am so ready to walk away , yet this would be the hardest walking away i’d have to do.
missing, dreams of re uniting, are things i don’t do or feel…….people come and go…this is wat a quote i read said…..but those who matter most leave footprints in ur heart….real friends….after the past two years, my heart must have undergone a stampede…it’s alive, and again…one day i will go, maybe get more stamps or less
but im happy with whom i know and what i learnt….
home…..i told u i dont miss things…..just strange things like my guitar, my space which now has become portable (i can detach yself almost any time to find comfort in my zone…..the mind is awesome), writing, singing……but home?….no…we’ve been moving all our lives, this is one part of my story that i have repeated with no second thought…i’d be down about moving, hated un packing and packing……but i know it happened for sure…and i know in some bit of my head i feel happy we moved, the evnts in each house, i remember…and the movement was like brushing the dust off of me….change is inevitable and constant, some can resist it…or try and avoid it, or find ways to cope……i’ve beome so used to it…i’m expecting it….and if i don’t i may only feel more lost……this i knowm these changes , physical changes i can validate, blame or give credit to…..but the rest…is vague…that may explain alot…but i’ve learnt in my life, for me explanations lead to no movement either way,,,,its not in everyone slife, but in mine,,,this is the case….my story, no glory…just change