you get to this point in life when u realize that you really have nothing…the ‘something’s you possess are normally ‘purchases’ from your parent’s account, or something you worked for…but when i say you have nothing, i mean, you realize that your identity is like a picture that has or is developing in your head, but it’s barely been established.of course your identity will change from time to time but the ‘who’ you are is under construction.
at that point, you can’t hold on to your/your parents’ bank account, your room, your violin, your traffic-cone….you’re taking steps to make something of yourself, to get somewhere….you’re steps, are your choices, the ones you make, break, are committed to, the direction you plan or impulsively take,
and at this point ‘choices’ are everything. every fucking thing. and when that’s taken from you …what do u have?
if a person makes the choice to choose. and takes responsibility for it and is committed to both choices, and changes one’s choices at their will with no harm caused to no one…(.if ever, some one needs and decides to bare the repercussions of the choices made, the ‘choosee’ takes it up.)..
then why is it not given to them?….it’s all you have, especially now….you don’t want to sit around making compromises …you think enough as it is, you just want the train tracks to end and let the train fall off the bridge, or collide with another..
you ride your vehicle, you learn the ways of the road you choose….you meet the gypsies, the devils on the road sides, you learn, love fight, succumb, thrive, die, are re born…it’s your choice….that’s all you want. the freedom to choose, to fall, break and live….and then and there the needle comes to stitch the opening wound when u want it to be infected. or the metal jams into the the bones that have just started to grow. what are u supposed to do…?
fuck! take anything, my little money, my under-used instruments, but for fuck’s sake not my choices….not the small ones or the big ones.