the bigger person…

yeah, you know…you think, you get it, you know it, and how your emotions are all okay…

and besides, based on what i believe…emotions are basically neutral in terms of right and wrong, so they just are what they are…and they are justifiable….

and yes, i’m going to twist this whole thing in a way where i don’t ave to mark my emotions as wrong..but instead i can choose to mark them as wasted, silly, naive and immature…fair enough?

and took some one to show that they are a bigger person than me for me to realize that…. you know the whole thing they say about being the ‘bigger person’…not dropping to some one else’s level….some one who proved to be small or narrow minded…used to make sense to me in a different sense…

now i’m not quite sure why the world marked it as one of the wise, important sayings, but as far as my knowledge goes, i thought it was about humility, about pride (like the kind of pride that comes from knowing better and being wiser), about showing your maturity and your open-mindedness…

i didn’t think it had anything to do with the person who you are choose to be ‘bigger’ than…

yesterday i was the smaller person…and he didn’t even know he was doing it…he was just being him, being just ‘good’..being ‘just’…thinking clearly, wisely, maturely, and with emotion but also rationality …and then i could have only been relieved to feel his warmth, understanding and appreciate his kindness and openness….

but a few hours later i realized how small i made myself….previously when my time had come to be open, mature and wise…i let emotions take over…i let my preoccupations, insecurities and protectiveness take over…

i’m humbled….to dust….

how do i tell him…i’m too ashamed to point out how we defer….actually i don’t even have to point it out…but how else am i supposed to show how much i value it…?

sometimes it takes other people’s ‘biggness’ to show you how far you are from being more of ‘you’, and to what extent you need to learn and have a growth spurt…

and i’m grateful for these little angels….


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