Keine Angst

Keine Angst…”don’t worry”…there’s some thing about how it sounds in German that creates in me, the same or similar feeling that ‘Om’ probably creates in someone who meditates..

Find the center…seek out where it hurts, or where any sensation arises, that you can directly relate to when you feel how you feel…

seek out the physical source…

seek out the underlying emotional status…

burn it…

i’ve got so many words, so much anger, so much sadness, shame and vulnerability… vulnerability…how did this word suddenly being to sound beautiful?…too many thoughts…blog posts, songs and poems and internal conversations fail and the over flowing, melting pot of “stuff” finds its way to my dreams and cutting out my supply of sleep…and what can i stand and fight or react for with lost compassion?…so i’ll be quite…quiter than before…

it’s easy to assume that the thoughts verbalized are new when some one never mentions them…some of us blurt out things spontaneously and sometimes we act on them…sometime’s we don’t….it should be just as easily assumed that when thoughts are verbalized, they may have been being brewed for ages in some one’s mind…they may have never been mentioned simply because the person lacks confidence in stating thoughts, or because the person simply does not wish to be known by anyone to that extent…

and for those who do this, i suppose we should then, blurt out our thoughts understanding that it could surprise the other person…

fair enough..

there’s no passion left…all is fair in passion and passionlessness..

it’s funny how determination and the ‘no-excuses’ attitude has kicked in when passion has evaded me….maybe because i always knew all the things i was passionate about and would make me happy, much before i could make sense of things i read or before i could properly write…

when i hear people speak about how this realization is something that very few people are lucky to have if they ever do..i think of how lucky i was/am….and how i got nowhere with this self-knowledge…and why…what happened? what stalled me for what seems like a lifetime…..so many things….and now looking back, all those, many many, little-big, and big -little things…were really, no-things…

i just hope while i’m seeking out every opportunity, every opportunity comes my way to put my new found glory into practice…

ha! i’ve even lost the ability to be cryptic..

so be it…so little to lose…when i thought i had little to lose, i got even “littler” to lose.. (that’s a pun if you can see it)

and what of listening to others instead of myself? i had to forget the adverse affect that could have to remember it..

so many thoughts, so many things, so many emotions, too many dreams, the melting pot..overwhelming, so overwhelming that i assume the cover of deeper lack of consciousness….keine angst, keine angst, keine angst…

‘no it doesn’t take your will to set your brace on me, i never doubt your possibilities…please let go of my sleeve..’

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