what happened to fearlessness ?

‘courage’ she said..

and it lit up in me like a light-bulb…

it takes courage..my mind was beating around the bush and it just wouldn’t fess up to why i, or a lot of us wouldn’t really just get up and do something about some situation such as.. i don’t know…say, giving clothes or money to the poor, or food, or educating a bunch of kids who live down the street..

most of us look for organizations to join…with reasons and prerequisites that tend to, at least initially distance us from the process of doing what we initially wanted to…

of course there is power in groups..and sometimes support is required…for protection, as some sort of insurance..and also, through organizations perhaps funding is more possible to receive..

but it’s nothing new that a lot of organizations use their funding for employee cars and house rents and stuff…thats why when people began to look behind the Invisible Children Kony fiasco, it was astonishing to find that money went elsewhere…it was more like “oh yeah you eat a whole  a lot of money too, nothin new…aight…movin’ on…”

and yet in the midst of these towering orgainizations who are charitable to both people who desperately need the charity, and those who don’t like their employees and stuff…there’s also those individuals, or small groups if individuals, who have little, but make the most of what they’ve got…

and i was sitting in this lovely court yard that belongs to a friend, speaking to his mum…the slight chill in the air that was already heavy with nostalgia…and i was awing at how i know some individuals who don’t think of joining organizations and groups…they just get up one day, set their minds to something, and go out and do it…

and i couldn’t pick up on the “how” of what they do…facing people, with out hiding behind the organization, exposed to possibilities of blame, or defame, financial issues and what not…

and i thought well, perhaps its because there something about being represented, or representing, than standing alone… but i never admitted to myself, what was wrong with standing alone…

nothing really..

it’s fucking brilliant…

i mean i enjoy sticking out like a sore thumb among a sea of fish (haha yes fish and thumb…silly comparison)

but, if i can and enjoy standing out in such situations what’s so tough when it comes to actually interacting with people…nothing….again…

it’s simply a matter of courage…of knowing exactly what one stands for, and accepting your strengths and your weaknesses and just doing what you’ve sent your mind too…

months back a thought occurred to me..my hands grabbed a pencil, and the pencil reached out for a wall, and the wall revealed one short rhetorical question….

what happened to fearlessness….it’s no more a rhetoric…it seems like some how we resign to accept that we have fear..which is ok…it’s good to accept our weaknessess…our limits…but sometimes we need to change, when we feel the need to do something, when we can’t afford to let our fears get in our way,,,

the rhetorical question, is a proper question…because change is required….

if we feel so passionately about the dying, the poor, the kidnapped, raped and discarded….copy pasting links, and helping things go viral contribute to a cause but they don’t really cause an effect…

you can leave your two cents, when sharing a thought or an opinion…but you can’t give a meagerly two cents to charity, love, change… they require much more than that…sometimes your blood, sweat, and heart….

something got to change..

don’t worry., this is a self -note…i’m not pointing fingers at anyone ..i dont have the right to..and never will have the right to..

eddi reader – what you’ve got…


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