sometimes you feel like the car next to you is moving forward at the signal when you’re actually moving backward
sometimes while resting your feet on the table you think the table you’re pushing the table forward but actually your pushing yourself backward…
the illusion of one movement is broken by the truth of another movement
when u first think that the car by your side is moving forward you can’t stop anything from.happening till you watch for further cues and realize the truth of the moment.
you realize that not just one but all the cars look like they’re moving forward….that you’re getting further away from the signal…etc.
and in the midst of the noise in the pub that’s dying down, as the lights come on..this almost-stranger sits very cooly on an amplifier and genuinely states his opinion about you…an opinion you think is much better than what you deserve…and you quite, unintelligently say, ‘you never know’..’why?’…he just genuinely thinks that about you, and he confirm it with a shrug…not the shrug that says , ‘i dunno,’ but more like a shrug with a nod that says, ‘just a fact.’
and you very matter-of-factly say how you always feel the good can be bad.
he looks “genuinely” like a good person, hence he must kill bunnies in his basement.
‘because….because…that’s balance..good and evil’
the dude shrugs again…this time it’s a ‘yeah, whatever I guess’ kind of shrug.
in solitary contemplation you come to realize that when you thought you were pushing forward you were getting pushed backward…
everyone’s got the good the bad, ghe beautiful, the ugly, some bits are more prominant than others…but you’re so used to seeing the devil come out in those who nurtured you…you can’t just take the good and good and give the devil his due…
in time…in time you’ll shake it off…and the puzzle will look less messy.. but don’t take too much time..someday the sun won’t shine.